2009 Rules


Ownership

Ownership Fee$25

Roster

Each owner must select ten (10) hitters for a hitting roster, five (5) pitchers for a pitching roster, five (5) living Hall-of-Famers for the Hall-of-Fame Death Pool roster (see new HOF rules below), and one Magic Number. Owners can "share" players or Hall-of-Famers; this means that more than one team can have the same player or Hall-of-Famer.

Use this form to submit your roster.

Roster Due-Date

Rosters must be submitted no later than one minute before the first game of the Regular Season, which according to our sources is Monday, April 6.. So, getchyer rosters to pedregoso@santa-lechuga.com and to rube@santa-lechuga.com by 1:09 pm EST on Monday, April 6.

Trades

Anytime during the 2009 regular season, owners can make as many as ten anytime trades. However, the later the trade is made, the more it will cost.

. During the first month of the season: $5 per trade
. After the first month and before the All-Star Break ends: $10 per trade
. After the All-Star Break: $15 per trade
. During the month before the playoffs: $20 per trade

Trading ends when the Regular Season ends, which is with the final out made of the final game played on the final day of the season (including one-game playoffs to determine regular season Division or Wild Card winners).

Use this form to make trades.

Core Standings

Points for the Division Standings, Regular Season Standings, Playoff Standings, and Overall Standings will be awarded as follows:

During the Regular Season

. Hitters earn 10 points for every home run hit
. Hitters lose 1 point for every K
. Pitchers earn 1 point for every K
. Pitchers lose 5 points for every homer surrendered

During the Divisional Playoffs

. Hitters earn 20 points for every home run hit
. Hitters lose 2 points for every K
. Pitchers earn 2 points for every K
. Pitchers lose 10 points for every homer surrendered

During the League Championship Series

. Hitters earn 50 points for every home run hit
. Hitters lose 5 points for every K
. Pitchers earn 5 points for every K
. Pitchers lose 20 points for every homer surrendered

During the World Series

. Hitters earn 100 points for every home run hit
. Hitters lose 10 points for every K
. Pitchers earn 10 points for every K
. Pitchers lose 50 points for every homer surrendered


All-Star Standings

If a player on your roster wins the All-Star Home Run Derby, your team picks up 250 points

During the All-Star Game

. Hitters earn 150 points for every home run hit
. Hitters lose 25 points for every K
. Pitchers earn 25 points for every K
. Pitchers lose 75 points for every homer surrendered

Points earned in this category are allocated exclusively to the All-Star Standings and are not allocated to the Overall Standings.

Power-Hitting Pitchers Standings

Power-Hitting Pitchers points will be awarded to teams whose pitchers perform rare feats opposite their specialty. So, pitchers on your pitching roster will be awarded points for hitting a home run. (In 2004, this category was known as Bonus Points)

Power-Hitting Pitchers

  • Pitchers earn 20 points for hitting a home run. Additional points may be awarded, depending on the Magic Number. (See "The Magic Number" below.)
  • Pitchers earn 50 points if the home run is a grand slam. Additional points may be awarded, depending on the Magic Number. (See "The Magic Number" below.)

Points earned in this category are allocated exclusively to the Power Hitting Pitcher Standings and are not allocated to the Overall Standings.

Hall-of-Fame Death Pool Standings

You pick five -- count 'em, five! -- Major League Baseball Hall-of-Fame inductees (only those active at the beginning of the 2009 season). If HOFers on your roster die, you pick up points. The team with the most points at the end of the World Series wins the pot.

Here's how points are awarded: Points are earned by subtracting the reported age of the dirt-napper at the time of his death (rounded down to the most-recent birthday) from 100 and multiplying the result by 5. So, an 80-year-old would get 100-80=20*5=100 points. A 40-year-old would get 100-40=60*5=300 points. Additional points may be awarded, depending on the Magic Number. (See "The Magic Number" below.)

Once an HOFer has officially become worm food, you can't replace him on the roster.

Points earned in this category are allocated exclusively to the Hall-of-Fame Death Pool Standings and are not allocated to the Overall Standings.

The Magic Number

The Magic Number breaks the logjam of ties for the Hall-of-Fame Death Pool and the Power-Hitting Pitchers standings. The Magic Number reduces the number of owners who tie at the end of the season while increasing the size of the payout checks for winners. Here's how it works:
  • You pick a number, a single number, from 1 to 31. You'll keep the number for the whole season. You can't change it (even if you end up picking the same number as another owner).
  • For the HOF Death Pool: The team with the Magic Number closest to the Date-of-Death (DoD) will get an extra 25 points. If that team's Magic Number matches the DoD, the team will instead get 50 extra points. So, if Bob Feller dies on the 16th and you have the closest Magic Number at 15, you'll get Bob's normal 55 points plus an additional 25 Magic Number points. If, however, Bob dies on the 15th, you'll get the 55 plus an extra 50. Note: More than one team can be awarded the extra points if their Magic Numbers are equidistant to the DoD. So, if Bob dies on the 15th and one team has 14 and another has 16, both teams will get the extra points.
  • For Power-Hitting Pitchers: Same idea. The team with the Magic Number closest to the date that a pitcher on their roster hits a home run gets 10 extra points. So, if the pitcher hits a dong on 16th and you have 15, you get 20 points for the dong and an extra 10 points for the Magic Number. If he hits it on the 15th and you have 15, you'll get an extra 20 points for a total of 40 points. (For grand slams, it's an extra 25 and 50 points, respectively.)

Pedregoso & Sue's Creepy Cardinals Pitcher Death Watch Pool

Seeing as how Creepy Cardinal pitchers have died at a rate double that of Hall-of-Famers over the past six years, Pedregoso Rios and Sue Klinkhamer are personally putting up $100 dollars apiece every season to be awarded to the SLPL owner who identifies the next Creepy Cardinal pitcher to die during the regular season or playoffs (for as long as the Cardinals are playing). Offseasons don't count. Pedregoso and Sue will both add $100 to the pot every season until someone scrapes it off the table. Here's how it works:
  • Each year owners chooses an active Creepy Cardinals pitcher (unless, not wanting a one-way ticket to hell, the owner opts out). If the chosen Creepy Cardinals pitcher dies while on the Cardinals' active roster, you win the pool and win the pot.*
  • If your selected pitcher gets traded from the Cardinals, you've lost him for the season (unless and until he gets traded back); you cannot replace him on your roster.
  • If your selected pitcher gets demoted to the minors, you've lost him unless and until he gets promoted back to the bigs; while in the minors, he is not eligible and you cannot replace him on your roster.
  • If your selected pitcher is "Out for Season," he's not eligible and you cannot replace him.
  • If your selected pitcher is simply on the DL, he's still eligible to die for your cause.
  • The Magic Number breaks the tie and potentially increases the pot. So, as with the Hall-of-Fame Death Pool, the team with the Magic Number closest to the Date-of-Death will win the pot.* If your Magic Number matches the DoD, Pedregoso'll throw in another $50. Ties will split the pot total pot.
  • If your guy dies on the day of a scheduled start, before the game, Pedregoso'll throw in another $25. Let's call this the "Kile Bump."
  • If he dies on the field of play as a result of an injury during a game or within 24-hours after having been injured on the field of play and as a result of the on-field injury, Pedregoso'll throw in an extra $100. Let's call this "You Lucky Sonuvabidge Bump."
*You can only win $100/year (plus any relevant bumps) for the number of consecutive seasons you've been in the league, starting in 2008. So, if it takes another five years before another Creepy Cardinal pitcher dies but you've only been in the SLPL for two consecutive years, you will only win $200 (plus any relevant bumps).

For the 2009 season, the pool is $400.

The Rube Clause

The Rube Clause can be summarized thusly: What Commissioner Rube Furrow says, goes. That means that, despite our best efforts to rule fairly, give payouts justly, and make sure league owners are happy campers, Commissioner Rube Furrow's word is the final word when it comes to any disputes, complaints, statistical anomalies, and payouts.

Additional Disclaimers

Read at your own risk. Contents to change without notice. Safety goggles may be required during use. For educational purposes only. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Any resemblance to real persons living or dead is purely coincidental, unfortunately. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. Illustrations are slightly enlarged to show detail. List each check separately by bank number. No CODs. Lost ticket pays maximum rate. Shading within a garment may occur. Dry cleaning only. Don't quote me on that. Contents may settle during shipment. May be too intense for some viewers. Contains no artificial colors or ingredients. Best if used before date on carton. Not intended for off-road use. Simulated picture. Times approximate. Keep away from fire or flame. Everything on this web site is subject to change without notice. Anchovies or jalapenos added upon request. Text is made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles. Allow four to six weeks for delivery. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. No other warranty expressed or implied. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Postage will be paid by addressee. Subject to CAB approval. This is not an offer to sell securities. Apply only to affected area. May be too intense for some viewers. Do not stamp. Do not expose to sunlight or heat exceeding 320 K. Do not pierce or burn, even after use. Please recycle. Use other side for additional listings. For recreational use only. Do not disturb. If condition persists, consult your physician. Harmful if swallowed. No user-serviceable parts inside. Freshest if eaten before date on carton. Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop. Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement. As seen on TV. One size fits all. Many suitcases look alike. Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients. Colors may, in time, fade. We have sent the forms which seem right for you. Slippery when wet. For office use only. Not affiliated with the American Red Cross. Drop in any mailbox. Edited for television. Keep cool; process promptly. May cause any of the aforementioned effects and/or death. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any efect, error or failure to perform. Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. At participating locations only. Not the Beatles. Penalty for private use. See label for sequence. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal. Do not write below this line. Falling rock. Lost ticket pays maximum rate. Your canceled check is your receipt. Add toner. Avoid contact with skin. Sanitized for your protection. Be sure each item is properly endorsed. Sign here without admitting guilt. Slightly higher west of the Mississippi. Employees and their families are not eligible. Beware of dog. Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show. Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery. You must be present to win. No passes accepted for this engagement. No purchase necessary. Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton. Shading within a garment may occur. Use only in a well-ventilated are. Keep away from fire or flames. Replace with same type. Approved for veterans. Booths for two or more. Check here if tax deductible. Some equipment shown is optional. Price does not include taxes. No Canadian coins. Not recommended for children. Prerecorded for this time zone. Reproduction strictly prohibited. No solicitors. No alcohol, dogs or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise specified. Restaurant package, not for resale. List at least two alternate dates. First pull up, then pull down. This is a beta test version, we're not responsible for any damage to your file-system. Call toll free number before digging. Driver does not carry cash. Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only. Record additional transactions on back of previous stub. Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T. Do not fold, spindle or mutilate. No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop. Package sold by weight, not volume. Mileage may vary. Beware of the kids. Disclaimer does not cover tornado, flood, hurricane, lightning, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, and other Acts of a Supernatural Entity, misuse, neglect, unauthorized repair, damage from improper installation, typos, misspelled words, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered signatures, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, and incidents owing to motor vehicle accidents, airplane crash, ship sinking, leaky roof, falling rocks, mud slides, forest fire, broken glass, flying projectiles (which can include, but not be limited to, arrows, bullets, BB's, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, or emissions of X-rays, Alpha, Beta and Gamma rays, knives, stones, etc.) or dropping the item.

This disclaimer may not be copied without the expressed written consent of Major League Baseball, the National Football League, Rube Furrow, and whomever it was that we stole it from. This supersedes all previous notices.